There is no joy in Mudville (Monterey, Tennessee, site of the collapsed dam) this morning but there is joy in Baton Rouge as the Louisiana State U Tigers dealt Vandy their second loss of the Southeastern Conference season last night; another 1-0 loss due to a "small ball" run just like last Friday night against Georgia in Nashville.
[Today's Trivia Question: What do all the words highlighted in green have in common?
Answer: They all start with a consonant.
Alternate Answer: They are all geographic locations contained in the Mathematical Set "Southeastern" except for the word Southeastern which is the Set Name, all others being located within that so-named Set.
Anyone who knows Mathematical Set Theory could easily see that.
Next time we'll try a tougher trivia question.]
Mason Hickman pitched another great game but it resulted in yet another No Decision for him. LSU scored the lone run of the game just after a 15 minute game-delay (more on that a bit later) when, in the bottom of the 8th inning, the lead-off man walked (lead off walks end up scoring approximately 70% of the time in college baseball), followed by a sac bunt, runner going to 3rd on a weak grounder hit to Harry Ray, and then scored when a Sam Hliboki slider bounced off Ty Duvall's glove and rolled half way to the LSU dugout. Ty recovered the ball, make the throw to home, but the runner kicked the ball out of Sam's glove as he tagged him out. Video replay was "inconclusive" and the HPU (home plate ump), Jeff Head, once again had his head in his ass and the safe call was "upheld because of no conclusive video to show otherwise despite lots of lingering doubts."
MORE ON THAT: The delay was caused by a possum who ran onto the field. The possum was being chased by an alligator. Possum's like to "play dead" but this one would have none of that because if it played dead it would soon be for real dead given how alligators don't give up easy. Just ask Steve Irwin. The scene was reminiscent of the Sunday game versus UT in Knoxville when a drunk black bear ambled onto the field to halt play in Knoxville. That time, Tony Vitello resolved the matter by running out and tackling the bear, who was then tranquilized and relocated to Tony's back yard to play with his kids. No such heroics in LSU, however, as Paul Mainieri was last seen hightailing it out the LSU bullpen into the waiting van in the parking lot being driven by Alex Bregman, the same Alex Bregman who was Paul's accomplice in the Great Walmart Super Store Toilet Paper Heist earlier in the week. Sad to say, the possum didn't make it. The Stadium Security guy did rescue it from the alligator, but he took it home and the whole family enjoyed it for dinner after the game. This was the 4th night this week his family has dined on Rally Possum. This is likely what happens to most possums in Louisiana, although one can never be for sure about that if one doesn't live in Louisiana, which Junior doesn't, and never plans to either, although he does like to visit New Orleans from time-to-time. Wonderful city full of wonder such as the time Junior wondered, "I wonder why they don't build higher levees? I wonder why they bury their dead above ground? I wonder why that lady is exposing her breasts? I wonder why I don't come to here more often?"
To top things off the Official Scorer ruled an error on Sam, thereby making the run unearned. Sam has still not given up an earned run this year despite the first loss going on his record.
Vandy made things close in the top of the 9th. Alec Hess "Toy Truck" was still on the mound after throwing only 83 pitches through 8 innings. The inning started with him striking out pinch-hitter Will Duff "Beer, Homer's Favorite" on a nasty slider. Then Carter Young laid down a beautiful bunt for a single. Cooper Davis then drag bunted and was called out at first by a whisker in what could only be classified as "another blown call by an SEC umpire",) Young taking second. With two outs CJRod strode to the plate dragging his bat behind him (he's a big fan of AMar) a determined look on his face.
CJRod ran the count to 3-2 after fouling off 8 consecutive pitches to stay alive. He also continued to breath which is another reason he stayed live; his heart was pumping, but not especially fast as he has "iced Lipton tea in his views" according to Tim Corbin who once saw CJ down 8 glasses of tea at his backyard barbeque he holds for the team at the conclusion of each Omaha Challenge.
Alas, CJ ended the game with AMar on deck when his scorching line drive to left-center was caught by the Bayou Bengal's leftfielder on a diving catch where he just stuck his glove out, closed his eyes, and hoped for the best. Fortunately for him, the best is what happened.
After the game Max Herz interviewed LSU's Star of the Game, home plate ump Jeff "Doodoo" Head.
MAX: "Jeff, many call you the Dean of SEC Umpires due to your long service and outstanding track record of being a fair umpire. Do what do you attribute your total failure tonight on that call at home plate where LSU scored their lone run?"
JEFF: "Could you rephrase the question, I didn't quite get that. I stopped listening after you said 'fair umpire'."
MAX: "Why did you throw the game in LSU's favor?"
JEFF: "Well, that question I can understand. I don't throw games but I do have 4 ex-wives and 13 children, so that does sort of add up to a lot of alimony and child-support payments. Not that that had anything to do with anything, I just thought you might like some personal information about me that most people are loathe to discuss with strangers. Which you are, Max. You're very strange, in fact you could star in Netflix's next season of 'Stranger Things'."
MAX: "I sense that you are trying to dodge the question, Jeff. In my long life I have found that people who dodge a question don't want to answer the question because they know that could result in a perjury charge should it every come to trial."
JEFF: "Was there a question in there somewhere? I stopped listening after you said 'Jeff'."
MAX: "I ask the questions, not you. This is an interview; I'm the interviewer; you're the interviewee."
JEFF: "I know you graduated from Vanderbilt but you don't have to try to confuse me with big words like that, although it was effective as I don't know what any of those words mean. Bank deposits to an off-shore account in the Caymans can't be traced by the FBI can they?"
MAX: "Well, we've run out of time which is fortunate for Jeff because the next question I was going to ask would have knocked him on his raunchy ass and, potentially, earned him a berth at Leavenworth. Tune in tomorrow for our Star of the Game Show.
Now back to the studio for an update on other action around the SEC this evening."
In other action around the SEC:
Bama beat UK like Saben beats Pruitt
UT beat MO like UT football players beat the rap
GA beat A&M like Michael Vick beats dogs
OM beat USCjr like Mike Bianco beats a path to the mound
Auburn beat State like they beat Bama in the Iron Bowl
Florida beat Arkansas like Sully used to beat his wife and kids
Vandy and LSU resume the series tonight on TV as Kumar Rocker goes to the mound for the Dores.
Once again, Kumar is faced with a high-pressure game, i.e., retain the ability to win the series on Sunday by winning tonight. He's come through with flying colors in past such situations and Junior certainly hopes he does so again tonight.
[Today's Trivia Question: What do all the words highlighted in green have in common?
Answer: They all start with a consonant.
Alternate Answer: They are all geographic locations contained in the Mathematical Set "Southeastern" except for the word Southeastern which is the Set Name, all others being located within that so-named Set.
Anyone who knows Mathematical Set Theory could easily see that.
Next time we'll try a tougher trivia question.]
Mason Hickman pitched another great game but it resulted in yet another No Decision for him. LSU scored the lone run of the game just after a 15 minute game-delay (more on that a bit later) when, in the bottom of the 8th inning, the lead-off man walked (lead off walks end up scoring approximately 70% of the time in college baseball), followed by a sac bunt, runner going to 3rd on a weak grounder hit to Harry Ray, and then scored when a Sam Hliboki slider bounced off Ty Duvall's glove and rolled half way to the LSU dugout. Ty recovered the ball, make the throw to home, but the runner kicked the ball out of Sam's glove as he tagged him out. Video replay was "inconclusive" and the HPU (home plate ump), Jeff Head, once again had his head in his ass and the safe call was "upheld because of no conclusive video to show otherwise despite lots of lingering doubts."
MORE ON THAT: The delay was caused by a possum who ran onto the field. The possum was being chased by an alligator. Possum's like to "play dead" but this one would have none of that because if it played dead it would soon be for real dead given how alligators don't give up easy. Just ask Steve Irwin. The scene was reminiscent of the Sunday game versus UT in Knoxville when a drunk black bear ambled onto the field to halt play in Knoxville. That time, Tony Vitello resolved the matter by running out and tackling the bear, who was then tranquilized and relocated to Tony's back yard to play with his kids. No such heroics in LSU, however, as Paul Mainieri was last seen hightailing it out the LSU bullpen into the waiting van in the parking lot being driven by Alex Bregman, the same Alex Bregman who was Paul's accomplice in the Great Walmart Super Store Toilet Paper Heist earlier in the week. Sad to say, the possum didn't make it. The Stadium Security guy did rescue it from the alligator, but he took it home and the whole family enjoyed it for dinner after the game. This was the 4th night this week his family has dined on Rally Possum. This is likely what happens to most possums in Louisiana, although one can never be for sure about that if one doesn't live in Louisiana, which Junior doesn't, and never plans to either, although he does like to visit New Orleans from time-to-time. Wonderful city full of wonder such as the time Junior wondered, "I wonder why they don't build higher levees? I wonder why they bury their dead above ground? I wonder why that lady is exposing her breasts? I wonder why I don't come to here more often?"
To top things off the Official Scorer ruled an error on Sam, thereby making the run unearned. Sam has still not given up an earned run this year despite the first loss going on his record.
Vandy made things close in the top of the 9th. Alec Hess "Toy Truck" was still on the mound after throwing only 83 pitches through 8 innings. The inning started with him striking out pinch-hitter Will Duff "Beer, Homer's Favorite" on a nasty slider. Then Carter Young laid down a beautiful bunt for a single. Cooper Davis then drag bunted and was called out at first by a whisker in what could only be classified as "another blown call by an SEC umpire",) Young taking second. With two outs CJRod strode to the plate dragging his bat behind him (he's a big fan of AMar) a determined look on his face.
CJRod ran the count to 3-2 after fouling off 8 consecutive pitches to stay alive. He also continued to breath which is another reason he stayed live; his heart was pumping, but not especially fast as he has "iced Lipton tea in his views" according to Tim Corbin who once saw CJ down 8 glasses of tea at his backyard barbeque he holds for the team at the conclusion of each Omaha Challenge.
Alas, CJ ended the game with AMar on deck when his scorching line drive to left-center was caught by the Bayou Bengal's leftfielder on a diving catch where he just stuck his glove out, closed his eyes, and hoped for the best. Fortunately for him, the best is what happened.
After the game Max Herz interviewed LSU's Star of the Game, home plate ump Jeff "Doodoo" Head.
MAX: "Jeff, many call you the Dean of SEC Umpires due to your long service and outstanding track record of being a fair umpire. Do what do you attribute your total failure tonight on that call at home plate where LSU scored their lone run?"
JEFF: "Could you rephrase the question, I didn't quite get that. I stopped listening after you said 'fair umpire'."
MAX: "Why did you throw the game in LSU's favor?"
JEFF: "Well, that question I can understand. I don't throw games but I do have 4 ex-wives and 13 children, so that does sort of add up to a lot of alimony and child-support payments. Not that that had anything to do with anything, I just thought you might like some personal information about me that most people are loathe to discuss with strangers. Which you are, Max. You're very strange, in fact you could star in Netflix's next season of 'Stranger Things'."
MAX: "I sense that you are trying to dodge the question, Jeff. In my long life I have found that people who dodge a question don't want to answer the question because they know that could result in a perjury charge should it every come to trial."
JEFF: "Was there a question in there somewhere? I stopped listening after you said 'Jeff'."
MAX: "I ask the questions, not you. This is an interview; I'm the interviewer; you're the interviewee."
JEFF: "I know you graduated from Vanderbilt but you don't have to try to confuse me with big words like that, although it was effective as I don't know what any of those words mean. Bank deposits to an off-shore account in the Caymans can't be traced by the FBI can they?"
MAX: "Well, we've run out of time which is fortunate for Jeff because the next question I was going to ask would have knocked him on his raunchy ass and, potentially, earned him a berth at Leavenworth. Tune in tomorrow for our Star of the Game Show.
Now back to the studio for an update on other action around the SEC this evening."
In other action around the SEC:
Bama beat UK like Saben beats Pruitt
UT beat MO like UT football players beat the rap
GA beat A&M like Michael Vick beats dogs
OM beat USCjr like Mike Bianco beats a path to the mound
Auburn beat State like they beat Bama in the Iron Bowl
Florida beat Arkansas like Sully used to beat his wife and kids
Vandy and LSU resume the series tonight on TV as Kumar Rocker goes to the mound for the Dores.
Once again, Kumar is faced with a high-pressure game, i.e., retain the ability to win the series on Sunday by winning tonight. He's come through with flying colors in past such situations and Junior certainly hopes he does so again tonight.
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